1st Follow up to: I hate to be told this too shall pass

I went to work today thinking of talking to my boss and saying 'I just want you to know'. I thought of asking him to make a code, so that I could call him and say "help". I thought of asking my son for his suggestions, but he's off somewhere untying bombs. My son would possibly tuck a bomb into his pocket and bring it home for me to throw at him. I thought of others I could ask for input.

And then the light went on. For Pete's sake, your work place has several West Africans in it.

Ok, I'm working. I see one of the West Africans come in. The confident one. Him! Ask him.

So I go "Sssssssssst!" It's been 17 years since I lived in Africa, but it just comes out. Actually it's a convenient way to get his attention, because I can't remember his name. In this country we go "Psssssssst." But I know if I omit the P he'll turn his head because he's African. He turns his head.

Our family used to use this to call each other in a crowded place when on furlough int he U.S. --- like church or the mall. If you went Psssst everyone would turn their head. But if you went Ssssssst, only the missionary kid would turn his head. Convenient.

So I ask him if he can come by my desk after he clocks in. I wait. I'm needing a cup of coffee. He doesn't come so I go upstairs.

I run into him. I say you are from West Africa, right? I said even though I lived in Africa 11 years, I need to ask you a question about African culture. Well, I tell him, I know each country is unique, but in your country is this normal? And I tell him briefly what happened. I say I never had to deal with this stuff when I lived over there because I was married.

He is smiling knowingly. I say I want to know [1.] what to do to stop this man from doing this without being mean (unless I have to), and [2.] how to understand it culturally.

He says he is starting with the second part, how to understand it. Yes. He says this is very normal. In Africa when a man is interested in a woman, he just goes directly at her just like that. In America you don't tell a woman that kind of thing.

Well, sorry for taking all the fun out of the story. It was much better an American cultural slant. And I don't feel quite so special any more. How many other women has he told he fell in love with at first sight?

I'm telling you, though, I saw a tall man with a blue shirt out of the corner of my eye today and I was looking for the first bin full of yellow bags to hide in.